Play@YSDC

I found this Prank Ritual out in cyber space and thought it was amusing enough to share!

Ritual of Strength

What you'll need:
1.an incense of large charcoal briquettes, and a brazier, with a metal grill upon it, in which to burn it.
2.various food items from the four food groups
3.a quiet place to go and perform the ritual
4.Big heavy metal things

Ritual:
•Light the incense, and place above it the various food items. Continue until food is thoroughly purified. This provides the spiritual energy needed to perform the rest of the ritual.
•Pick up the metal things.
•Put down the metal things.
•Assure yourself that you aren't just doing this because you're insecure about your penis.
•Repeat a few hundred times or as needed.

Call Cthulhu from any phone!

With this Ritual, all you need do is pick up a phone and say "Call Cthulhu" into the receiver. Within seconds, the Great Old One will pick up the phone, and you can talk to him. He will respond to you and act as if you might have been an old friend of his from school.

The good:

• You get to talk to Cthulhu
  
  I'm sure Cthulhu knows a lot more than you do, and he might share that knowledge if you're nice
  
  If you're really nice, and Cthulhu is in a good mood, he might just unleash his hell on your enemies

The bad:

• Cthulhu might be busy, and he probably doesn't like being interrupted
  
  You may go insane from the knowledge he bestows upon you
  
  You probably shouldn't make jokes at his expense